Endless Summer
I have so enjoyed the weather this summer. Its been just this side of dry... not enough to qualify as a drought or to cause worry over crops/gardens etc. but dry enough that the days are more likely to be clear and sunny that what we normally get in Ohio. The pastures are green, the skies are blue, the breeze is refreshing and the days are long. If I could bottle these days I would and release them into the dark, cold, wet days of Feb. and March. When you care for horses you are definitely at the mercy of the weather. Life is good in July/Aug. but life in the barn is a struggle in Feb. with the frozen ice buckets, not a green blade of grass in sight and the bitter cold and long dark nights. The only thing that gets me thru Feb. is knowing it will end and I will appreciate all the more the sun and warmth of spring. I wonder if horses can think in seasons like that? Can they hold on to the good in life now to get them thru the hardships and challenges of winter?
I have been jarred from enjoying this beautiful summer to think about suffering and struggle as I am dealing with the difficult task of making some decisions about some older much loved horses of mine. I have two that have some pretty significant health issues. Right now life is at its easiest as far as horses in general are concerned (although neither of the horses I mentioned are 'curable') so if things are difficult now they can get downright awful very quickly. Is it fair to the horse to wait until it is at that point when these horses have been wonderful horses? Oh, but why does the decision have to rest on me? When I have cared and loved these animals for a good portion of their lives? I am feeling the weight of responsibility on doing what is best ~~ not necessarily what is easiest~~ but what is the best thing to do in light of the horses quality of life. Oh this is so hard.
I guess while I am bottling up these beautiful days of summer I would bottle up the days of health, vigor and vitality too. I'd release that back to these two horses for just a little while longer.
Comments
One of the horses I mentioned in this blog also foundered a couple years ago. After the intial crisis she has done better than expected but she also has a locked stifle. So for one medical condition she should be on dry lot...but on dry lot she doesn't move and this aggrivates the arthritis and locked stifle. She is in pain and becomes unsteady on her feet. On pasture she moves and does better in that respect but then I walk a fine line with her being on grass and taking the chance she founders again. So far she is maintaining. I set the deciding factor to be if she can no longer live like a horse-- when she needs to be seperated from the herd, when she loses her mobility it is no longer fair to her. As a prey animal they know they are vulnerable and unsafe when they can't move and away from the herd. I just can't do that to her since she has been such a sweet horse.
Oh but it is SO hard.
thinking of you,
Sue